This post is three-fold which is the reason for the post title. These are my musings and a recap of the happenings in our lives right now. Read on if you want a glimpse of my crazy mind or don't. This post is for me.
First, remember the post from last week where I introduced you to some amazing flea market finds?! Well I am happy to say that they are up and making my kitchen happy :)
I was immediately thrilled that I had a place to display some of our favorite mugs and organize the pens in the kitchen, but the area was lacking a little color so I set to work incorporating bright turquoise. I just mixed one part paint that I had in my craft drawer with one part water and washed it over the "mugs" cup hanger.
It is subtle but I love it and I wanted to share :)
I also wanted to tell you that I have a really fun diy project coming up that involves beautifying this:
We are working on a few finishing touches so hopefully I will be able to share the finished product as well as a couple of tutorials from the process later this week!
The final reason for this post, and by far the most important, is to share what God has been working with me on over the past week. I have shared on here a few times that I do not love my current job, but I have never shared the reasons behind my dislike. It is not a dislike of the job that I am doing, because I am a talker and love to meet new people, but it is the way I feel while doing the job. The devil has used this job to stir up self-doubt, make me feel worthless and weak, and encourage me to tell myself that I will never succeed at this job or any other one that I pursue. I reached a point before the Christmas break where I broke down in heaving sobs because I did not want to face another day where I was a failure. The first day back to work after break I cried again because for two glorious weeks I was surrounded by family and friends and felt like me for the first time in months.
I have shared these feelings with a few people, but mostly I fought the battle by myself because I felt that I should be able to handle it. Last week Thursday I was driving and a song came on the radio and the one part that stuck out to me was "you were made to fill a purpose that only you can do". I just started crying and began to see for the first time that the devil was really at work in my hatred toward my job, and that I had the power of the Kingdom of God on my side. I shared my struggles for the first time with our Financial Peace University class at church, and was so encouraged by the outpouring of support from everyone in the group. I felt such a huge weight lift off my shoulder, because I knew that God had placed warriors around me that would help me fight the battle. They are praying for me, encouraging me, and working to remind me that my identity is in God and God alone.
Now I am working on having a healthy relationship with my job as well as putting in the time with God each day so that I go out into the world with the armor of God on me. Most mornings when I get ready to leave the house I still get a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach, but I am trying to rely on the word of God and pray to Him to help me through the struggles.
Thank you for letting me have a post for "me" where I can really put into words what I am battling and solidify my resolve to battle it with God on my side.